Blog: False Belief Systems

Three Lies that cause Unnecessary Suffering-by Heidi McLaughlin

Posted: February 12, 2019

I know you can relate when I tell you I’ve caused myself a lot of unnecessary suffering because of lies I believe. For example: Lying awake at night because I made a mistake, did something where I didn’t measure up, said the wrong thing again or misinterpreted a comment.  Imagine what joyful and fruitful lives we could experience by overcoming some of the daily, debilitating lies. We know all our shortcomings and foibles so it’s easy to condemn ourselves.  God’s truth seems so perfect and unreachable. The reality is that we live in a world of truth and lies The list of lies is endless but I will tackle three. This is my personality. Really? Your personality was shaped through all the imperfect script, images, information and your environment. Yes, a large portion of it was passed through your family genes, but God is in the people transformation business. You’re…

Posted in: adversity, angry, ask God, Beauty from the Inside Out, Christ, decisions, disappointment, disappointments, Expectations, Faith, False Belief Systems, faulty thinking, feeling bad, Freedom, God's love, grief, happiness, healing, joy, lies, love, messes, needs, Overcoming Struggles, pain, personalities, pray, self worth, self-esteem, suffering, temporary, Valued

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Why It Takes Grit to Hope-by Heidi McLaughlin

Posted: January 28, 2018

  We all know the searing pain of disappointment. I was nine when I experienced the raw feeling of being forgotten. Left on the side of the road by my older cousins while they spent the day at the fairgrounds. My tender, young heart never forgot that horrible, no good day, and disappointment became a reality that turned into a false belief. It felt cruel to disappoint my own children or friends. Most of my adult life it felt like I was skating on thin ice to protect others and myself from disappointment. So what happens when you become a Christian and put your hope in a loving God? When life doesn’t work out. Or, in fact when life hits you in the gut? One of my words for 2017 was HOPE. It was the year where I needed something good to happen. I was in deep grief, crushed, physically…

Posted in: disappointment, Expectations, False Belief Systems, grit, Heavenly Father, Hope, Prayer, victory

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UNLEASHING THE K.I.S.S. MARRIAGE- “I’m not Dancing That Dance Anymore”

Posted: October 22, 2011

If you read my blog on a regular basis, you are familiar with my consistent inspiration to “show respect to your husband.” Yet, there is a yellow caution line that we need to be aware of; and that warning line is about knowing the difference between respect and enabling. This is where the danger lies.  Women are natural nurturers and nurses.  Many women feel it is their responsibility to make sure everyone and everything in life runs according to her inner, visual blueprint of life.  Let me explain the difference: Respect:  The bible tells us in Ephesians 5:33 “…and the wife must see to it that she deeply respects her husband-obeying, praising and honoring him.” We can give people respect when we see and acknowledge their God given characteristics and potential to grow and become more like Christ.  We show them respect so that it will “call out” their inner…

Posted in: Balancing life, Beauty from the Inside Out, Communication, Control, Expectations, False Belief Systems, Finding Truth, Friendship, Good Marriage, Hope, Intimacy, Kindness, Making Wise Choices, Pain Pleasure, Resentment, Respect, Understanding each other, Valued

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UNLEASHING THE K.I.S.S. MARRIAGE-The Deceptive Gucci Luggage

Posted: May 24, 2011

“Have you left your luggage unattended at any time?” This is one of the questions the girl at the airline check-in counter asks before she allows me to plunk my luggage onto her conveyer belt.  I know this simple, ridiculous question is for my safety; to protect me from terrorism or any other harm.   Yet so many of us, before we say our “I do’s” and get ready to fly into our marriage; don’t ask each other that straightforward, life saving question.  We arrive at the marriage alter dragging our gorgeous, deceptive Gucci luggage which holds all of our garbage and secrets. There probably has not been any reason to unzip the baggage; after all you have both been in a magical, endorphin induced courtship. Now the day to day routine of life begins with its challenges and obstacles, and before you know it you are pulling the luggage zipper…

Posted in: Balancing life, Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty Unleashed, Communication, Encouragement, Expectations, False Belief Systems, Finding Truth, Forgiveness, Friendship, Good Marriage, Hope, Intimacy, Making Wise Choices, Pain Pleasure, Resentment, Understanding each other

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BEAUTY TIP #35 – Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

Posted: February 18, 2011

January is an insane month in the gym; people are falling all over each other in the cycling classes, racquet ball court, on the cardio machines and pumping iron. There is a tension and a determined resolution to get in shape and become a “new you” after the Christmas over-indulgence. I can only surmise that many of those people looked in the mirror on January 2nd and were horrified at what they saw. With their new runners and their fancy new Adidas bag, they are off to the gym to make that much needed dramatic change.  It is only February 18th and right now you can shoot a canon in the gym and you wouldn’t hurt anyone. What happened to all the enthusiastic people who wanted their new bodies? I can just imagine the language in their head, “I had no idea it would be such hard work; I’m too…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty through Boldness, Encouragement, False Belief Systems, Finding Truth, Friendship, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Struggles

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BEAUTY TIP #34 – Sand in my Shoes

Posted: January 29, 2011

The feeling of being barefoot and squishing sand between my toes evokes a giddiness of freedom. If I nudge near the ocean just near enough to get the occasional splash of gorgeous, turquoise sea water, and the sun warming my cheeks; I feel like a child again. Free to frolic, run, laugh and giggle. Being barefoot in the sand unleashes a brazen abandon that I find in no other place. I cannot get this freedom when I wear shoes. It is blatantly unrealistic of me to think that I can frolic in the sand and not expect to get sand in my shoes. Those irritating grains of sand that will find that little crevice and rub away at me until I either take off my shoes or leave the beach. Annoying, hurtful and disappointing!  An unrealistic expectation is like an irritating grain of sand-a silent thief that will rob us…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty through Boldness, Expectations, False Belief Systems, Finding Truth, Hope, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Struggles, Resentment

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BEAUTY TIP #33 “Radiance”

Posted: January 21, 2011

I yearn to be radiant. Not the kind where I walk into a room with the perfect outfit, a forced smile and all the right answers; but a radiance that has the effervescent glow of something more powerful, beautiful. I crave a radiance that does not scream my obvious striving, or cover my messiness and grittiness. I am helpless to attain this but I am on journey and quest to find it.  Every morning I start by talking to God about my plans for the day and off I go to embrace the day with a smile on my face.  Grittiness sets it.  I get irritated, people let me down, and I compare and feel insignificant and wonder if I will ever get it right. I’m not the only one; I hear weary sighs and laments from people everywhere. Demands and expectations have clogged our days and we lose sight…

Posted in: Beauty from the Inside Out, Beauty through Boldness, Encouragement, Expectations, False Belief Systems, Finding Truth, Freedom from Busyness, Hope, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Fear

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BEAUTY TIP #25 – Diminish Doubt

Posted: October 15, 2010

We live in a daily tension filled reality. Do we believe we have been created for something magnificent and that God has a glorious purpose for our lives, or the reality of seeing our pitiful, fatigued selves in the mirror and feeling the pain of our unsatisfying and sometimes painful circumstances?  When we fully believe that we have been called to a specific task, purpose or calling-that we have used our best five strengths and boldly unleashed the gifts God has given us and then all doors are slammed shut. Someone must have been lying. Instead of answered prayers, reconciliation, plans moving forward and open doors, the future says:  NO VACANCY, DO NOT DISTURB, CLOSED FOR THE SEASON, OUT OF BUSINESS, NO TRESPASSING.  Right now I am dodging the bullets of doubt and hanging on by my fingernails to the reality of my abundant life and God inspired purpose. It’s…

Posted in: Expectations, False Belief Systems, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Stuggles, Uncategorized

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