Blog: take care of your heart

THE RESENTMENT BOX-by Heidi McLaughlin

Posted: June 10, 2024

We want to be nice girls so we stuff our feelings, paste on a plastic smile and carry on. Inwardly the heart churns and toxic fumes accumulate as we drink our own poison hoping the other person will die.  Resentment is the number one killer of relationships, especially marriages. I consider myself an expert on this topic as I learned how to recognize and survive this toxic crisis in my first marriage.  I recall how each time I felt resentment, I wanted to pick up a rock and throw it toward my enemy.  But because I tried to have harmony in the home I hid the rock (my anger) and put it into a pretty little imaginary box where it would be nice and safe. I was clueless about the dangers of ultimate explosions. I did not know that resentment was: Feeling heartbroken after exerting a great deal of effort…

Posted in: accusations, adversity, angry, Anticipation, anxiety, ask God, Assumptions, betrayal, confront conflict, disappointments, do the hard work, don't give up, Expectations, faulty thinking, Finding Truth, forgive one another, frustrations, grit, healing, honest, Hope, messes, Offenses, Overcoming Struggles, power of words, relationships, Resentment, set free, shame, take care of your heart, Tension, trouble, Understanding each other, worry

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ALONE ON MOTHERS DAY-by Heidi McLaughlin

Posted: May 10, 2024

I’m not telling you I’m alone on Mother’s Day to feel sorry for myself, or for you to take pity on me. I’m alone and that’s just a fact. None of my children, step-children or grandchildren live near me and sometimes that really wounds.  Mother’s Day is a big Hallmark moment with flowers and cards, and many women suffer silently knowing they are alone. This blog is for women who have to put on a brave face for Mother’s Day. “Above all else protect your heart”. (Proverbs 4:23)  Since my husband’s death I’ve had to learn how to get through these lonely Hallmark moments. I prepare ahead of time. I’ve already booked myself in as a single on a golf course, and I’m already looking forward to it. Why not do the same…not golf but perhaps lunch or a hike with a friend? Maybe your way of overcoming loneliness is…

Posted in: all alone, alone, companionship, empathy, Encouragement, grit, hiking, loneliness, loneliness epidemic, make time for each other, Mothers Day, our children, Overcoming Struggles, relationships, take care of your heart, we need each other

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A PRICELESS GIFT-by Heidi McLaughlin

Posted: April 1, 2024

With the world swirling in chaos all around us we need something real and meaningful to hold onto. Something that really works. Before someone dies they have no reason to hold back words of love and wisdom. After all the heard earned wisdom they’ve gleaned in this life, now is the time to say what really works and matters. Before Jesus went to the cross to die for our sins He gave us a priceless gift: “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you: (John 14:27). “My peace I give you.” After Jesus’ resurrection and when He met his disciples behind locked doors, He frightened and startled them, thinking He was a ghost. The first words to them out of Jesus’ mouth were: “Peace be with you” (Luke 24:26). There it is again, the gift of peace. That gives me goose bumps, Why is peace such a powerful…

Posted in: anxiety, ask God, chaos, Christ in us, Finding Truth, gift of peace, Overcoming Struggles, pain, Peace, Prayer, priceless gift of peace, take care of your heart, troubles, worry

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WHAT WE FEED GROWS-by Heidi McLaughlin

Posted: January 12, 2024

Over Christmas I fed my body a little too much and it grew. You know what I’m saying. Maybe yours did too? Because what we feed grows.  When we water and feed our houseplants, they grow rich and beautiful. When we feed our children they grow up to be big beautiful human beings. What we feed grows. So we have to ask ourselves, “What I am feeding?” I have to be honest; there are hard days with big problems that I can’t solve. As a result I feed self-pity. There are times when I look at my circumstances and I feel like I might drown. What do I feed? Self-defeat, I’m not smart enough to solve my problems. Sometimes I feel like somebody is disappointed in me and doesn’t like me. Maybe I’ve done something wrong. What do I feed? I feed unworthiness. I’m not good enough, not likeable. So what do…

Posted in: beauty and joy, beauty in God's creation, desires, disappointments, Eat God's word, empty soul, feeling good, God's creation, God's promises are true, happy heart, Heavenly Father, Making Wise Choices, Overcoming Struggles, pity, presence of God, rest, self-defeat, take care of your heart, thankful, transformation, unlovable, What we feed grows

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Surviving the Christmas Fatigue-by Heidi McLaughlin

Posted: December 11, 2022

It’s not always the big stuff that can push us over the Christmas edge; sometimes it’s an accumulation of multiple little things that cause fatigue. For example: Saturday I was going to start my Christmas baking of cookies and my never fail butter tarts. But I didn’t check my flour supply and forgot about the corn syrup for the filling. So in the middle of a big mess, with no makeup and without brushing my hair, I’m driving down snowy, slippery roads to my closest store; Wal-Mart. But they were out of corn syrup. So were two other stores.  By the time I navigated all the parking, ran up and down a zillion aisles, stood in line to pay for one item, I’m struggling to keep smiling. Not to mention cancelled events, (for which I prepared) and wall-to-wall people in the mall. Each year I am determined to have a…

Posted in: anger, Anticipation, anxiety, Christmas fatigue, Christmas joy, disappointments, Exit plans, Expectations, Freedom from Busyness, frustrations, Move on, relationships, Resentment, rest, Say no, Simple, Solitude, take care of your heart

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What my Hydrangeas Taught Me-by Heidi McLaughlin

Posted: August 15, 2022

Something happened to my hydrangea bushes this year. The flowers, which always give me so much joy and delight, this summer they’ve given me pathetic disappointment. But in all this they’re giving me some valuable life lessons. When planted in the right soil and sun/shade, hydrangea bushes are exquisitely beautiful and resilient. When I prune them just right they flourish year after year, and as I dry the flower heads, they add stunning décor to any room in my home. Until they don’t. My two bushes gave me joy for 25 years but were slowly becoming root bound and it was time to dig them out and plant new ones. So I planted new bushes with joyful expectation. But sadly the new bushes are not thriving, instead they look sick and I’m not sure they’re going to make it. I fully believe God gives us examples in His physical creation…

Posted in: 5 things, adversity, beauty and joy, bitterness, crisis, decisions, disappointments, empty soul, Encouragement, Expectations, feeling good, Finding Truth, Forgiveness, fresh joy, frustrations, hydrangea bushes, joy, Overcoming Struggles, pruning, relationships, Resentment, retaliation, satan, take care of your heart, tender soul care, toxic relationships

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