UNLEASHING THE K.I.S.S. MARRIAGE – Sweet Anticipation
Posted: March 9, 2012
There is no greater, delicious, exciting emotion than anticipating some future pleasure. I love to go out to a favorite restaurant with a group of friends and scour the menu with the anticipation of a tantalizing, scrumptious meal. Often times the anticipation is better than the actual result, but that is the crux of sweet anticipation.
For the past six months Jack and I have been anticipating our “spring get-away”. Remembering the enjoyment of our past experiences gets us geared up to book flights, buy new golfing clothes, look for books to read as we lay by the pool, and check out new and fun activities. The six months of preparation is the actual daily sweet anticipation of something so delightful.
We all need to anticipate something enjoyable. Without the hope of something pleasurable in the future, we get tired, grumpy, irritated and we lose the zest for everyday life. This is especially true in our marriages. Sometimes the simple “dailyness” of life can cause couples to get bored with each other and turn to something else that will bring them pleasure. This is difficult at any stage in your marriages, but especially for young couples during the years of raising little children. The dailyness of diapers, suffering from lack of sleep and juggling more bills than money in the bank can at times feel like you have stopped loving each other. This is also true of retired couples who feel they have talked about everything, done everything and there is nothing left to discover in each other. Then there are the “in between couples” buried in their careers, raising teenagers and moving so fast in their daily activities that they no longer eat together or enjoy the simple pleasures of talking and laughing about silly and pleasurable activities.
The anticipation does not have to be an expensive cruise or vacation to a tropical island that will bury you in more stressful money management. It can, and should be, something that can be added into your daily life. For example:
1. I know one young mom with three little children who anticipates spending one-half hour by herself after supper and browsing on Pinterest, while her husband takes over the responsibility of the children.
2. It is absolutely crucial that young couples plan and anticipate a date night when they can talk about something other than children’s schedules and unpaid bills.
3. Sometimes knowing my husband will give me a foot rub at the end of the day, helps the day to go faster and easier.
4. Do you have a good book waiting for you to curl up on the couch and continue the saga?
5. Do you have a favorite sitcom or portion of CNN that you and your husband enjoy?
6. Do you have a project such as scrapbooking, sewing, painting, writing, jewelry making that begs to be finished and your anticipation to work on it is absolutely delicious?
7. Anticipate a movie and coffee night with your husband.
9. Anticipate re-painting a room or refurbishing an old piece of furniture.
10 If you are a golfer, like my husband and I are, this is a good time to look around for special golf prices and anticipate playing those amazing courses together.
11. Plan and anticipate sharing an evening in your home with friends, a great meal and playing a board game.
12. Anticipate buying a new pair of shoes.
13. Now is a good time for you and your husband to visualize something new for your garden or deck. Plan and anticipate what that will look like.
14. Plan and anticipate to do something “greater than yourself.” That means, doing something for your neighbor, your church, your community or someone else that is struggling. Doing something for someone other than you can bring new energy, purpose and it kills the doldrums of daily life.
Without the anticipation of something greater than our daily struggles, we become despondent and it can cause our souls and marriages to perish. It is absolutely crucial to plan some sweet anticipation. The operative word here is plan. Do it.
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Great blog Heidi. Just to let you know, my radio show is moving to Prime Time in April- exciting anticipation. I’d love to have you on again this spring if your schedule allows!